Candy Low

Today I consumed an entire bag of Cookies n' Cream Kisses.

I feel gross.

I am tired.

I can't finish my harder workouts these days.

Why have I not learned?

I haven't gained any weight.

I haven't lost any weight.

I get frustrated at night because I have little energy.

Thus I am not a very good mom.

Lesson: Eat Well. Feel Well. Act Well.

Patience: A Virtue

I have not written this past week or so..... and I think that is mainly because I have not been doing what I am supposed to be doing. Of course by not writing I am negating the purpose of this blog, but after coming back from vacation I just got knocked off course.

This past week or so has been filled with Andes mints, Cookies and Cream Kisses, and Hot Tamales. Now of course, this is only counting the candy... much less everything else I ate.... In my head, I wasn't really thinking about it; I just let it happen. I also tried to convince myself that the light walking, and occasional sit up counted for my exercise. Then, tonight I listened to a talk given by Dieter F. Uchtdorf of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, and now I have learned a little more about what it takes to really do this. I am going to quote from his talk given at Priesthood Session of this past General Conference below. Maybe you will also see how this relates to how you balance your life with food and exercise.

Waiting can be hard. Children know it, and so do adults. We live in a world offering fast food, instant messaging, on-demand movies, and immediate answers to the most trivial or profound questions. We don’t like to wait. Some even feel their blood pressure rise when their line at the grocery store moves slower than those around them.

Patience—the ability to put our desires on hold for a time—is a precious and rare virtue. We want what we want, and we want it now. Therefore, the very idea of patience may seem unpleasant and, at times, bitter.

Nevertheless, without patience, we cannot please God; we cannot become perfect. Indeed, patience is a purifying process that refines understanding, deepens happiness, focuses action, and offers hope for peace.

As parents, we know how unwise it would be to indulge our children’s every desire. But children are not the only ones who spoil when showered with immediate gratification. Our Heavenly Father knows what good parents come to understand over time: if children are ever going to mature and reach their potential, they must learn to wait.

Because of this section, I understand how much learning to balance my food, learning to withstand a bag of candy, or just learning to have only one piece is so much bigger than just losing weight. It is about control and maturity. This isn't something that will only last till I am 150 lbs, but it needs to be a deepening process of my self-control.

I learned that patience was far more than simply waiting for something to happen—patience required actively working toward worthwhile goals and not getting discouraged when results didn’t appear instantly or without effort.

There is an important concept here: patience is not passive resignation, nor is it failing to act because of our fears. Patience means active waiting and enduring. It means staying with something and doing all that we can—working, hoping, and exercising faith; bearing hardship with fortitude, even when the desires of our hearts are delayed. Patience is not simply enduring; it is enduring well!

Impatience, on the other hand, is a symptom of selfishness. It is a trait of the self-absorbed. It arises from the all-too-prevalent condition called “center of the universe” syndrome, which leads people to believe that the world revolves around them and that all others are just supporting cast in the grand theater of mortality in which only they have the starring role.

From this, I learned that this past week was silly. I just need to work hard and keep working hard. I have to be patient, and keep plugging along.

Patience means staying with something until the end. It means delaying immediate gratification for future blessings.

You can see how the gospel goes hand in hand with being fit and making wise decisions on how we treat our body. When something is true, it is true in every aspect of your life.

I am now renewed to give up my bags of candy and my lazy mornings because as he says "delaying immediate gratification for future blessings". I want those future blessings.

Back from Vacay

Well, I am back.... but not really back.

It has been hard getting back into my routine. I haven't really exercised in the last two days, and I have been eating many candies and sweets.

Overall the vacations, I lost about 3 lbs (so I gained one lb from this last one).

I am wondering yet again, if I am going where I am now? Do I really have to keep going? Can't I just sit back and relax? The logic in my head says, "Of course you should keep going, you feel great and you fit into clothes that you haven't been able to fit in for months". However, my emotions and laziness says, "you feel great, it will stay this way, you can stop, see the progress you have already made, that's good enough".

It's a hard battle, and I hope that I can get through it. Maybe I should just sit in front of my inspiration wall and just get to it. I guess I just need to mentally return from vacation.

Vacation... is hard

First full day on vacation - I have to say that it is harder than I expected. I thought that even though people say that it is difficult, that I was prepared. I knew what I would do....

Yeah right.

When your mom has cookies (low fat) on the counter, Ritter Sport in many varieties availble to try, and yummy dinners. I have definetly gone over my calorie limit. I don't know how well I will do this whole trip, but I will try my best. I am at 184 right now, so I guess the scale will tell me how I have done when I get home.

Start of Travels

I started my vacation today. I woke up and went on a nice bike ride to the library to return a video before I left. As we started our journey, I thought that I would be fine and that I was very well prepared.

Well, I finally got to my parents house and realized I was starving. The airplane ride took it out of me. I underestimated the energy it would require to sit in the same spot for so long. With pasta on the counter... I just went into it. My mother also had a number of packages of Ritter Sport out on the counter.... well to say the least... I ate over my calories. I don't even know by how much. Tomorrow, I will do better :)

Bees on the brain

For the last number of weeks my mind has been on my goals of healthiness and trying to keep track of everything I have been doing, well not today......

This morning, I did a relaxed exercise of biking, and I today I tried to eat well. We ended up eating at a place called Sharky's where you can order "naked" items. This means they use fat free sour cream, fat free cheese, cook with no oil, and have limited carbs. It was very tasty. I will probably go there again (my meal was only 398 calories).

Most of the day, however, was spent dealing with the overwhelming amount of bees that showed up at my doorstep with in about 3 hours...







Yes, I know. Now you know why I was more consumed with this problem at my door step than eating right or working out (which luckily I was able to do anyway). We got a nice beekeeper to come out with a hive and transfer them. So any that are left, after he takes his hive, we will just kill with our killshot spray stuff.



p.s. I spent the day at my friend's house so to avoid the bees that had come into my house. She has let me borrow her hand weights (3 lbs, 5 lbs, and 7 lbs). I am excited to use them during my strength workout. Stretch bands are hard to use for certain exercises.

Remembering Reasons

There are just those days that seem like this quest is just so silly.... Why would I want to lose weight when I know I am going to get pregnant right after... It doesn't seem to make any sense, at least it didn't today.

Luckily, I have a telephone. I called up a few of my friendly support club members (aka friends) that might also understand this "family way" difficulty. And they reminded me that this journey is so much more than just being thin. They reminded me of all the other reasons I am doing this.
- to be a good mom, who helps her children be active and healthy
- to have healthy future pregnancies
- to be a spectacularly beautiful wife
- to live the commandments and abide by the teachings of the prophets
- to be the best me I can be

Plus, I have heard that it is doubly hard to lose the weight of the first baby after you have had a second.... Well I am 10 pounds away from where I was when I got pregnant with Ginger, so that is almost accomplished.

Downside of today:
Overeating on cantaloupe and cheese with crackers.

Upside of today:
I realized what good supportive friends I have. Thanks you guys for listening.

Sugar Cravings

Oh sugar...
How I love you...
I wish I could eat...
all the time....
But no...
I must learn....
CONTROL!

So today I was going through sugar withdrawals, which is hard considering I am only allowing myself one serving of dessert per day. Looking back though, I think drinking more water and appropriately using gum can really cut that down.

I sure hope so at least.

Overall, I didnt do so bad today. I ate around 1500 calories and went for a nice bike ride and a 3ish mile walk with a few friends. I am happy with my progress, though I sometimes wish that I didn't have to exert control.....everyone does though at least in one way or another..... mine just happens to be food.